If the beer is off you have the right to find a better party.
Sorry that you feel you have to go. Did you bring a coat?
No? It’s pissing down out there, you’ll catch your death.
Forecasts warned of rain, though none could say the depth,
or volume it would take to turn the ha-ha to a moat.
No brolly either? Dear oh dear. Bet you feel a proper Charlie.
But it’s not the beer, though, is it? It’s the entertainment
– rounds of Jenga, structures now more hole than brick,
and karaoke in a range of languages you do not speak –
not your kind of knees-up. All that foreign food, the cliques,
the bumptious kids who should have been in bed. The politics.
Thanks for coming. Hope you find alternative arrangements.